My Apologies to Emerson Hart

First, if you are going “Who’s Emerson Hart?”, I don’t want to talk to you. Wait, no…that’s not true. You can’t help it if you have not been enlightened to the greatness that is known as Emerson Hart. Stick around and I shall enlighten you. (Again, another long and rambling story to a relatively simple point.)Like many people in this country (and around the world), I discovered Emerson Hart about 12 years ago, I just didn’t know his name. I knew his face and his words and they played to me daily over Clear Channel airwaves (one of the few times I will thank CC). Yes, I had fallen in love with the “post-grunge” rock movement and with that Tonic was one of my favorite bands. Emerson Hart was the lead vocalist and primary song writer for that band, and his songs were like anthems for my generation.

Some time has passed since Tonic’s hay-day on the radio charts and if you did happen to know his name then, you have most likely forgotten it. We, as a music society, have moved on to other bands…Maroon 5, Fall Out Boy and Good Charlotte…most of which I despise. We’ve seen front-men of popular groups try to make their own way as solo artists (Rob Thomas) or as TV hosts and dancers (Mark McGrath); neither of which came with the same acclaim as their preceding gig. Then came Emerson Hart.

I first heard of Emerson’s solo efforts as word of mouth from a Rock Boater. I had to ask that horrible question, “Emerson Hart? Never heard of them, who are they?” Yeah, it sounds like a band name. I was told about how Tonic’s lead singer was starting a solo career, to which I rolled my eyes and moaned something about taking a clue when your 15 minutes are over. I meant it as no disrespect to Tonic, but again, some people should either stick with the band that brought ya, or give it up. My friend went on to tell me that I should give him a listen and be open minded about it. Whatever….

A few months later I am leaving a comment on Josh Hoge’s MySpace and I notice he had a blog about picking up Emerson’s CD. “He’s on the bandwagon too?” I thought. So I navigated over to Emerson’s MySpace and was going to give him a listen, but for some reason I didn’t. I don’t remember why, But I didn’t. I know I saw the album cover, but never listened.

I’m not sure how much time had passed after that day, but some time later I was browsing through Plan 9 Music looking for God only knows what that day. Anyway, I passed my a display of Emerson Hart Cd’s and thought “why not?” and picked it up. Cigarettes and Gasoline sat in my car in shrink wrap for a week or so; then it sat on my coffee table the same way for another week or so. I kept thinking “How good can it be?” “I bet he’s just trying to recreate his Tonic music”.

I finally popped in the disc and listened to it half ass. Then came Green Hills Race For California; it stopped me in my place. The lyrics, the arrangement, the emotion it created…I was transfixed. I started the CD again and really listened to it. I was instantly hooked. This wasn’t a man who was trying to recapture the sound of Tonic only to fall short; instead it was an earnest and beautifully crafted attempt to create his own identity as an artist.

I did some background research on some of the songs. I learned about the rough patch in his marriage that led to If You’re Gonna Leave; and the similar story about a friends failed marriage that inspired I Wish The Best For You. Cigarettes and Gasoline, the keystone song and title track was my favorite though, penned about the murder of his father. It was an emotional CD about relationships and I had an honest connection with it.

So, you would think I would be sold, right? Nah, that would be too easy. I then begin to think he’s probably a self absorbed asshole who’s living in the past. I figured he probably had some warped since of entitlement to fame because of his past contributions to the industry, but yet would resent anytime the name Tonic was brought up. Look, when I don’t want to like someone, I won’t! It’s a horrible trait and I’m trying to fix it.

I didn’t let my ignorance get in the way of enjoying his music., however. I booked to shoot his show at Toad’s Place in Richmond when he was to come through opening for Live. I was pretty excited to see him, was hoping to get a request in for Green Hills, but it never came to be; the show was canceled. About month ago I saw he was coming to Jamin’ Java in Vienna, but I would have had to miss work to drive up and I was already missing the next day to go shoot in Newport News. Then I see he books the Jewish Mother the day I’m in Newport News. I thought about heading there after the NN show, but I would have been late, plus the next day was Shamrock Fest and I had Eli with me. Shit!

So comes this week(end). I’d been jamming to Josh Kelley and Son’s of William in the car and then Thursday I decided to switch it over to Emerson. I hadn’t listened to it in a couple of months and I had forgotten how much I loved it. The next day at work I had it playing all day on the iDock and again in the car. Ahhh, I missed this CD.

Yesterday my husband had to work so I put him on again and as I was listening and blogging and I started to cry. As much I have always loved the songs and connected with them, yesterday a few of them really got me in the gut. Cigarettes and Gasoline and Flyin’….two of my favorites and the two that sent me to tears. After a few times of hitting repeat, I decided that was enough of that. Then what do I do; put on Lemon Parade…not a good move, I began to cry through Soldiers Daughter. GAH!

Now, I should have turned off Emerson Hart and called it a day with his music; I didn’t though. Instead I begin to YouTube him and I’m glad I did. I found some great show videos (his voice is amazing live) and then I found interviews and clips of what I can only call “Story Time with Emerson Hart”.

Emerson, if you ever read this, I owe you an apology. You are not the person I thought you to be. I laughed, I cried, I laughed so hard I cried…I was amazed how genuine and benevolent you are…and funny! I am so completely sorry for being a judgmental asshat! I don’t even know why I am that way and why I would choose to think the things I did, but I’m sorry…and very happy to be wrong!

I spent the day watching interviews and live clips and falling more and more in love with his as a performer. His love of being on stage and his engagement of the audience were so impressive to me. And what I found even more fascinating was his comfort to talk about his previous endeavors. I thought he may run away from playing Tonic songs or shy away from questions, as if to say he’s “over” that, but he doesn’t. He embraces his time with them and the music he wrote. I don’t know, all I can say is that having watched everything I did not only makes me appreciate his music more, but connect to it on a deeper level as well. Cheesy, I know, but oh well.

With all this being said, I have a goal. I want to see Emerson before my birthday (Aug 16) this year. I must! Not only see him live, but have the courage to talk to him and thank him for writing some of the most candid, authentic and poignant music I’ve ever heard . (I haven’t even been able to say that to Barry of Carbon Leaf and I talk to him a lot!) I know he’s playing in Raleigh next month and it’s impossible for me to go to. Don’t ask why this is such a big deal to me, I won’t be able to explain it (at least not in a way that will take less than 3 hours and 27 paragraphs), but trust that this is something that is very important to me.

So, I am going to end this with a plea. (I hate begging, but I think I can make an exception here.) It’s my desperate attempt to get Emerson back in the area soon…and please feel free to tell him when you see him at a show (you lucky bastards!) that you know about this insane girl in Richmond and her goal to see him before her birthday! I need your help people!